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Funny and fake 'leaked copy' of SONA a Facebook hit
A funny and fake "leaked copy" of President Benigno Simeon Aquino III's State of the Nation Address (SONA) published on the Newsbreak website became a hit on Facebook hours before the chief executive was expected to make the real speech on Monday. In the fake SONA, "Aquino" addressed "Former Presidents Fidel Valdez Ramos, Joseph Ejercito Estrada, and she who shall not be named for she is absent," referring to former President and incumbent Pampanga Rep. Gloria Macapagal Arroyo. Arroyo was present during the opening of the House of Representatives’ second regular session on Monday morning but will skip Aquino’s SONA later this afternoon and proceed to her hometown, Lubao, to interact with her constituents, one of her spokespersons said. "Aquino" begins his speech thus: "Mga minamahal kong kaibigan, kaklase, kabarilan..." or KKK, the supposed circle of friends and colleagues whom the media have criticized for allegedly receiving special treatment from the Aquino administration. Newsbreak also poked fun at the bachelor Aquino's slogan "Matuwid na Daan," referring to his administration's goal of pursuing the "righteous path." "Sa bawat sandali po ng pamamahala ay nahaharap tayo sa isang sangangdaan. "Sa isang banda po ay ang tuwid na daan. Mula Valenzuela, nakaabot ako ng Singapore, para lang makahanap ng First Lady ng bayan," "Aquino" said. "Sa kabilang banda ay ang baluktot na daan. Kaya ibinenta ko ang aking Porsche. Mungkahi ni Mar at Anne Curtis, mag-MRT na lang ako. Wala nang wangwang, wala pang counterflow," "Aquino" added. In the fake SONA, "Aquino" also blamed his predecessor for the major issues that have come out in the media: "Dahil kay Gloria, may toll free increase at oil price hike. Dahil kay Gloria, umabot po ng tatlong bilyong piso ang utang ng PCSO. Dahil kay Gloria, isanlibong porsyento naman ang itinaas ng utang ng NFA. Dahil kay Gloria, may climate change at binaha ang Metro Manila. Dahil kay Gloria, nag-away si Heart Evangelista at Marian Rivera. Dahil kay Gloria, naging “alleged" victim si Amanda Coling. Dahil kay Gloria, si Bedol ay naka bullet-proof vest at si Zaldy ay may “insignificant coronary artery disease." Dahil kay Gloria, nawalan ako ng love life at nalagas ang aking hairline." "Aquino" is also quoted as saying, "Our people deserve a government that works just as hard as they do. "A President must be on the job 24/7, ready for any contingency, any crisis, anywhere, anytime. Check out my schedule, ang busy-busy ko...Look at my picture, ang haggard-haggard ko," he added.
